Thursday, May 28, 2009

IN MY NEXT LIFE.....

GONNA BE A BEAR

In this life I'm a woman. In my next life, I'd like to come back as a bear. When you're a bear, you get to hibernate. You do nothing but sleep for six months. I could deal with that.

Before you hibernate, you're supposed to eat yourself stupid. I could deal with that, too.

When you're a girl bear, you birth your children (who are the size of walnuts) while you're sleeping and wake to partially grown, cute, cuddly cubs. I could definitely deal with that.

If you're the momma bear, everyone knows you mean business. You swat anyone who bothers your cubs. If your cubs get out of line, you swat them, too. I could deal with that.

If you're a bear, your mate EXPECTS you to wake up growling. He EXPECTS that you will have hairy legs and excess body fat.

Yep, gonna be a bear!



A friend of mine sent me GONNA BE A BEAR, and I thought it would be fun to share it here with you. Personally, I always thought it would be nice to come back as a cat. Oh, not a poor old stray that lives paw to mouth on the streets. No, I'd come back as a pampered house cat, the kind that rules the roost and has servants, not owners. Yep, I'd be the kind that sleeps anywhere she wants at any time of the day or night and eats only the finest cat food available, and that only when there's no steak or shrimp to be had. And if a mouse tried to steal my food, this is what I'd do:



Yeah, that would be the life for me. What about you? A bear's life or a cat's life? Or would you rather come back as something else? Certainly not as a penguin if this is the fate awaiting you!



Hmmmm. If dinner was that easy to catch, maybe I'd come back as a whale! :)

5 comments:

  1. I would be a gazillionaire! I'm happy being human but I'm so tired of working.

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  2. Shannon, you share a common ailment with the rest of us called "Tiredofworkingitis". The only remedy for it is to win the lottery or inherit a fortune. Hopefully one of those two will happen for you. :)

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  3. Cool beans! Love the blog. I'll vote for being a bear. Anyway--

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  4. Love the whale photo.

    Rhonda
    aka The Southern Half of Evelyn David
    http://www.evelyndavid.com

    ReplyDelete